Day 30 Well I thought I would be turning cartwheels today but no, just another day at the office. Am I happy? Yes, delighted! Would I recommend it? Absolutely! Did I have cake? No but I did have a mega bag of cheese and onion crisps/chips and a Twirl bar, yum.
I am feel strangely unmoved by it all though, it feels like I have been here for a long time and it feels comfortable (here come fear and panic) I genuinely do feel like I have picked up where I left it last time at five months. I am not so naive to think it is going to be all plain sailing but I feel in a groove and it is a good place to be.
So what is different this time?
1. I really wanted this by the time I stopped and it was time by the time I stopped.
2. I adopted the one day at a time mantra because forever is way too long.
3. I signed up to Belle's 100 day challenge, previously I would have scoffed and poopooed the idea but this time I embraced the challenge (thank you Red for the shove)
4. I have spent a lot of time sleeping and staying in bed late on the weekends as I was tired beyond belief and just allowed myself to be tired and not push it.
5. I have eaten quite a bit of really bad food (even for me) and I have not been all judgemental about it as I usually would.
6. I have spent a great deal of time reading blogs, commenting on blogs and writing a daily post. Reading other people's thoughts and ideas can really shine a light on things you may have thought but not fully embraced.
7. Survived a mega DAY LONG craving that I felt sure would beat me but it didn't I BEAT IT!!!
8. Told people, only those I truly love and respect and then benefitted from their support and encouragement.
9. Taken time to smell the roses, listen to the birds, enjoy my daily walk without obsessing over everything I have to do.
10. Incorporated at least 1 small 20 minute job into my day to foster a sense of achievement, but also forgiven myself and let it go on the nights when I just couldn't face it.
11. Cried, A LOT! I have had so much emotion bubble up out of me that I could rapidly cycle between laughter and tears and back again all within about 3 minutes.
12. Allowed time for introspection and reflection and sometimes written about it and gained even more insight.
13. Tried alcohol free beers. They work for me and are not a trigger but A/F wine would be a different story.
14. Not drunk alcohol, yep this time is also different as I haven't caved in and had a drink which is kind of the whole idea behind this.
I am sure there are other things too but that is everything that I think I have done this time that I hadn't really done before.
Blogging and commenting have been a big part of this for me and I have really benefitted from so much support and understanding. This is still a challenge for me as over time I have withdrawn into myself and this is starting to get me engaged again. Next step will be IRL- in real life. So here is to the next 30 days and onwards to 100.
Thanks to everyone in 'Team Ginger' that has helped me get to this point so far, all the support has been really valuable and a key part of this. If you can grit your teeth and get over the first 10 days then the next 20 are a little easier, I don't think anyone really rides the pink clouds day 1-10 so if you feel like you have been turned violently inside out and drained of personality hang in there.
Now, I have some chocolate to finish before bed if you'll excuse me.